Hair color determines Happiness in Love?

Does your hair hue make you happy — or make men more attracted to you?

By Laura Schreffler

Does your hair color really reflect your personality? I think so, but then, I’ve never been described as ‘needy’ before because of my goldilocks. Yet, a new study states that golden-haired girls need more from the men in their lives. My immediate questions are: ‘why’ and ‘is that a problem?’

Blondes need men more?

I’ve been every single hair color in the book. At 17, I decided to have a ‘Crimson Glow’ like Angela Chase (Claire Danes) in My So-Called Life. When I was 23, I went Paris Hilton platinum. At 27 I decided to look like the true Italiana I am and went jet black. Now I’m a happy mix of sunshine and darker blondes.

But do people see me differently? Back in the black days, I was doing a lot of TV appearances for the company I worked for. My utterly fabulous and very gay boss, Rob, would say: “Sweetie, you look like the b***h that’s going to steal everyone’s boyfriend. You are not TV friendly!”

Sadly, he was right. As a blonde, I get approached constantly. I don’t look threatening, mean or hard. Men seem to love it, and women — the same ones who would sneer in my general direction — are usually fairly nice to my face. Of course, that could be a Los Angeles thing; I was previously living in hard-as-nails New York City.

But I digress. This new study has found that brunettes (not raven-haired vixens, mind) are taken more seriously and are less needy than blondes. But here’s the catch: being needy is actually considered to be a good thing.

Studies have also shown that flaxen-haired women are also usually considered to be more attractive, younger and healthier-looking than brunettes; they also tend to earn more money and marry richer men. Everyone should go blonde!

The study, which was published in the Scandinavian Journal of Psychology by Viren Swami, Ph.D., was actually more of an experiment. A Caucasian woman visited three different nightclubs on three different nights as a brunette, a blonde and a redhead. Her hair was dyed by a professional in an attempt to look natural (because we all know that ‘natural’ isn’t the look some hairdressers go for).

The hair-hue that was deemed the most approachable: blonde, of course.

Here’s why. For the second half of the study, researchers asked men from each nightclub to rate photographs of the same woman with each hair shade. With her titian color, she was viewed as temperamental. As a brunette she was seen as being intelligent, approachable, competent and attractive. As a blonde, she was considered needy.

However, let’s remember that the blonde, while seen as ‘needy’, was still the most approached woman at the bar. Researchers believe that this is because the woman was viewed as easy because of her lighter hue. Said researchers have no actual research to back up said claim.

Here’s my theory: if ‘needy’ is the word being used, and men were still approaching them, they were going for the blonde gal because of a latent ‘must rescue damsel in distress’ complex. And no, before you ask, that’s not the technical term, thanks. All the old Disney princesses of yore — like Sleeping Beauty and Cinderella, for example — needed rescuing before old Walt’s company made the modern girls smart and independent like Belle in Beauty and the Beast.

Just a theory here, but because brunettes are viewed as self-sufficient and intelligent, a man who’s more afraid of rejection may opt for the easier (re: more approachable) option.

That said, it’s more about the girl you are than the color you have, isn’t it? I’ve found that smiling at a man — regardless of what hue I happen to be at the time — is a tried and tested way of not only getting noticed, but getting approached and asked out, as well.

Just smile

There’s no need to change who you are for a man. If anything, change your ‘do for you. Remember: always do what makes you and you alone happy.

In the words of Angela Chase: “When Rayanne Graff told me my hair was holding me back, I had to listen. ‘Cause she wasn’t just talking about my hair. She was talking about my life.”



Filed Under: Blogs


About the Author: Laura Schreffler is a former New York Daily News columnist who left the world of celebrity behind to focus on what makes her happiest — love and travel. She is the creator of — a website devoted to these two passions that she fondly calls “looking for love in all the right places.” In her spare time she likes to play matchmaker for her friends, dream about her next vacation and gaze at photographs of Taylor Kitsch. For more advice on love, relationships, and happiness, check out & her book "Internet Dating 101". And follow her here at Happiness Series with her weekly blog about finding love.

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