Sh*t Talking

Met Costume Gala, Part 4: the Actresses

By Zaira Zafra

Kate Hudson is a happy mom to be and bride, but here, here she reminds me of the Mermaid parade in Brooklyn. But like a big ole mermaid that’s been eating too much shrimp scampi. And it seems to fit poorly. Her hair looks like the Britney line of weaves, and she just looks like a bloat instead of a preguntos lady. I usually like Kate Hudson’s look, but she’s not rocking the belly like she should.

Another feather duster here – Last time she went, Liv looked kind of like Joan Crawford and I couldn’t decide if I liked it. This time her dress looks like she had an accident when she couldn’t get to the bathroom on time. AT least she has the feathers on the bottom to get the mess, amIrite?!

Alana brought her up, and I didn’t want to post this stupidity, but ugh Frida Pinto. Who told you to wear that dress? Whoever told you that is NOT your friend. Get rid of them and get rid of that outfit. This is literally a big tablecloth and a tie. Where is that secksy or cute? It’s also way too long so the whole look looks like a little girl playing dress up. It’s a conspiracy to make you look fuggers when you’re hot. Not cool, not buying it, and whack sauce.

Giraffe is wearing McQueen, which should make me happy, but it doesn’t. Why? Because she is not wearing the dress, it is wearing her. The dress is a luxurious red number that, on the right mammal, would work well to elevate said wearer. Instead it looks like it’s dragging and limp. I blame Giraffe.








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