I should probably be talking about The Bachelor and Juan Pablo whatever-his-last-name-is and whether he’ll make it with whatever-her-name-is, but I refuse to indulge in such nonsense. Finding true love on The Bachelor? Meh. The reality is that they’re chances are slim to none. I also won’t write about something I genuinely love and can talk for hours about, which has absolutely no correlation to anything resembling romance at all (True Detective I miss you so much already!) and I will write about a woman who seemingly has it all, including absolute confidence in herself and a fresh perspective on love: wunderkind Lena Dunham.
OK, I don’t love everything about Lena. I don’t love her with the same reverence I reserve for, say, Jennifer Lawrence. I don’t love that she she shows her ta-tas in every single episode of Girls, or that her character is so real that she’s borderline unlikable. I also don’t love that so much of her unlikable character appears to be a part of herself. But I’m not here to hate: I’m here to give her kudos.
Lena Dunham defines the American dream. She has amazing ideas, and she manages to convey them in the truest sense. She seems to not only know who she is, but she’s OK with who she is. She realizes her flaws, and she magnifies them to make others see that they don’t bother her. She’s ballsy and vivacious, witty and intelligent.
And that goes for her views on love, as well.
In the recent issue of Glamour magazine, she speaks about what a “supportive relationship” looks like, and like most of her other admissions, she’s hit the bullseye with accuracy.
“It’s somebody who gives you the space and time you need to do your work. Somebody who says, ‘You couldn’t do anything that would embarrass me. Just be yourself in a way that has integrity, and I’ll be proud of you.’ I think women are conditioned to stand by their man and watch them make it to the top, but most men never believe the person they get into a relationship with is going to rise any higher than she was when they met. It takes a very special, evolved person to be able to deal with change within a relationship.”
It isn’t as if Lena is the only famous person in her relationship: her boyfriend, Jack Antonoff, is the lead guitarist of the band fun.
And of course, support isn’t the only thing necessary to make a relationship work. But it’s a start And she’s right – it does take a special, evolved person to deal with change in a relationship. May you be lucky enough to find one of them.
Filed Under: Blogs
About the Author: Laura Schreffler is a former New York Daily News columnist who left the world of celebrity behind to focus on what makes her happiest — love and travel. She is the creator of LoveTrekker.com — a website devoted to these two passions that she fondly calls “looking for love in all the right places.” In her spare time she likes to play matchmaker for her friends, dream about her next vacation and gaze at photographs of Taylor Kitsch. For more advice on love, relationships, and happiness, check out http://lovetrekker.com & her book "Internet Dating 101". And follow her here at Happiness Series with her weekly blog about finding love.